Wednesday, March 19, 2008

My 2008 Bracket

No photo of the bracket this year; rest assured that this year's bracket looks remarkably like last year's.

EAST

North Carolina (1) over Arkansas (9)

Notre Dame (5) over Washington State (4)

Oklahoma (6) over Louisville (3)

Tennessee (2) over Butler (7)

Regional Final: Tennessee over North Carolina

MIDWEST

Kansas (1) over Kent State (9)

Clemson (5) over Vanderbilt (4)

USC (6) over Wisconsin (3)

Georgetown (2) over Davidson (10)

Regional Final: Kansas over USC

SOUTH

Memphis (1) over Oregon (9)

Michigan State (5) over Pittsburgh (4)

Stanford (3) over Kentucky (11)

Texas (2) over Saint Mary's (10)

Regional Final: Michigan State over Texas

WEST

UCLA (1) over BYU (8)

UConn (4) over Western Kentucky (12)

Xavier (3) over Purdue (6)

Duke (2) over West Virginia (7)

Regional Final: UCLA over Duke

FINAL FOUR

Kansas over Tennessee

UCLA over Michigan State

CHAMPION

Kansas

For some reason, I almost always end up picking Kansas. And they never win. Oh, well.


Thursday, March 06, 2008

Best Thing Since Joey-Joe-Joe-Junior

Here you can find Adam Carolla and Norm Macdonald (with an assist from Teresa Strasser and Bryan Bishop) "breaking down the game film" on the Kenny Rogers songs "Ruby, Don't Take Your Love To Town" and "Coward of the County."

[it should be noted that those with delicate sensibilities are urged -- begged -- not to listen to these two segments]

Attention, anyone who is ever planning on producing humor for the purposes of entertainment at some point: you can stop. We've got all we need. I'm not sure this is top-able.


McCain's VP?

We may be in for a long, ugly battle for the Democratic nomination for president, but John McCain is now the Republican nominee. So, we can focus on the fun (for now) part: who will be his running mate?

Google "McCain" and "running mate," and you'll see that I'm not the only person who enjoys thinking about this kind of stuff.

I think it's madness even to think about potential McCain running mates before we even know who his opponent will be, since the identity of that opponent will (or certainly should, in my mind) factor heavily into the decision. Like (and this is just one man's opinion), if Hillary Clinton gets the nomination, I think McCain is free to pick a white man; if Barack Obama gets it, I think he'd do well not to. So it's far too early to think about this stuff in earnest, but:

Let's break down the candidates, shall we? I'll give the pros, and the cons (as pertains to McCain. I mean, if I put "reliably conservative" as a "pro," don't flip out if you're reading this and you're a liberal. I only mean to say that "reliably conservative" is a "pro" if you're going to be running with John McCain, who has the reputation of being a maverick independent).

[by the way, I have a knack for predicting this kind of stuff. I'm the guy who, the day after the 2004 presidential election, referred to the "Clinton/Obama '08" Democratic presidential ticket]

[Of course, I'm also the guy who couldn't imagine a scenario by which Rudy Giuliani wouldn't be the Republican nominee. So we'll see what happens]

[note: I added this red part after I initially published this post; I realized I forgot about Florida governor Charlie Crist. Oh, well. Just pretend he's included here]

Tim Pawlenty, governor of Minnesota

Pros: Reliably conservative, but probably not to the degree that people in Manhattan and Berkeley will work themselves into a lather over it. Much younger (47) than McCain, but not too young (some names on the list are in their 30s; that might be too young. As a governor he has executive experience, which Senator McCain does not.

Cons: From Minnesota, not the South. Is a white man.

Mark Sanford, governor of South Carolina

Pros: Much younger than McCain (47). Is from the South. As a governor he has executive experience, which Senator McCain does not.

Cons: Describes himself (undoubtedly tongue-in-cheek, but still) as a "right wing nut." Is a white man.

Haley Barbour, governor of Mississippi

Pros: Is generally regarded to have reacted well to Hurricane Katrina, showing that he's at least capable, should he become president, of reacting well to something like Hurricane Katrina (which, to plenty of Americans, is something we could use in a president). Is young enough (60) where his age isn't an issue, but is old enough (60) where his youth certainly isn't an issue, either. Is from the South. As a governor he has executive experience, which Senator McCain does not.

Cons: Has a lobbying past, which doesn't particularly jibe with McCain's maverick image of bucking the special interests. Is a white man. Also, you just somehow know he's crooked, don't you? I mean, just look at him.

Joe Lieberman, senator from Connecticut

Pros: Everyone loves him.

Cons: Isn't a Republican. Not sure you can get around that.

Kay Bailey Hutchinson, senator from Texas

Pros: Isn't a white man.

Cons: Isn't much younger (64) than McCain. Is from Texas, which goes Republican anyway. Is a Senate colleague of McCain, and therefore brings no executive experience to the ticket.

Michael Steele, former lieutenant governor of Maryland

Pros: Is much younger than McCain (49), but not too young. Is black, but -- and I'm trying to be sensitive here -- couldn't look less threatening to a white person wary of voting for a black man.

Cons: Is, frankly, only showing up on potential VP lists because he's black. Not a lot of other former lieutenant governors of mid-sized states showing up on VP lists.

Condoleezza Rice, Secretary of State

Pros: Is relatively young (53), is black, is female.

Cons: Probably has next to no interest in being Vice President. Role in the Bush administration could be toxic when trying to court independents, at least to the extent to which anybody votes based on a VP candidate.

Colin Powell, former Secretary of State

Pros: Is almost universally respected (the only exceptions being people who would never vote for a Republican in a million years anyway). Isn't a white man. Has military and diplomatic experience.

Cons: Probably has next to no interest in being Vice President. Is only two years younger (70) than McCain.

Bobby Jindal, governor of Louisiana

Pros: Isn't a white man (his parents were from India). Is from the South. Is very conservative. Is much younger (36) than McCain.

Cons: Is very conservative. Is very young.

Sarah Palin, governor of Alaska

Pros: Isn't a white man. Is reliably conservative, but moderate on the hot-button issue of same-sex marriage (opposes it, but her administration oversaw the granting of state benefits to same-sex couples). As a governor she has executive experience, which Senator McCain does not. Isn't some greenhorn in her 30s (she's 44), but is young and vital enough that she's having a baby in May. Is, let's face it, hot.

Cons: Cons? Didn't you just read the last paragraph? Young hot female conservative governor!

In conclusion: McCain/Palin '08!

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